{"id":441,"date":"2014-12-11T12:07:44","date_gmt":"2014-12-11T20:07:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/?p=441"},"modified":"2014-12-11T12:07:44","modified_gmt":"2014-12-11T20:07:44","slug":"a-knights-tale","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/?p=441","title":{"rendered":"A Knight’s Tale"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A Knight\u2019s Tale<\/strong><\/p>\n

A long, long time ago.<\/p>\n

Or, so I\u2019ve been told.<\/p>\n

In days of old.<\/p>\n

When knights were bold.<\/p>\n

There lived a serf named \u2018Pantsedalot.\u2019<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll tell you how that name he got.<\/p>\n

It was because he was pantsed a lot.<\/p>\n

Sometimes he would pants himself.<\/p>\n

As he ran around trying to help.<\/p>\n

Down his pants would fall.<\/p>\n

Then he would begin to bawl.<\/p>\n

One day at a jousting match.<\/p>\n

The serf was serving the days catch.<\/p>\n

Fresh fish cooked just right.<\/p>\n

Served to nobles as they watched the fight.<\/p>\n

Someone \u2018pantsed\u2019 him as he went by.<\/p>\n

As he fell the fish did fly.<\/p>\n

Right into the kings lap.<\/p>\n

There it landed with a smack.<\/p>\n

The king was madder than hell.<\/p>\n

He looked over from where it fell.<\/p>\n

There was the serf tangled in his pants.<\/p>\n

The king flew into one of his rants.<\/p>\n

\u201cGrab that serf and bring him here!!\u201d<\/p>\n

The serf turned white & trembled with fear.<\/p>\n

\u201cFor doing such a graceful thing<\/p>\n

I will make you a knight\u201d said the king.<\/p>\n

He raised his sword and touched the surf\u2019s shoulders.<\/p>\n

He said \u201cI name thee \u2018Sir Pantsedalot\u2019, \u00a0The Bolder.\u201d<\/p>\n

Everyone roared with laughter and mirth.<\/p>\n

The poor serf felt lower than dirt.<\/p>\n

Now that he was a knight he was expected to fight.<\/p>\n

He didn\u2019t even know how to fly a kite.<\/p>\n

He felt for sure his days were numbered.<\/p>\n

About the results of this everyone wondered.<\/p>\n

The serf was given armor , a shield, and a sword.<\/p>\n

The king said \u2018Great will be your reward.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShould you defeat \u2018the Black knight\u2019 today.<\/p>\n

To you, I will give my daughter away.\u201d<\/p>\n

The serf secretly had a crush on her for years.<\/p>\n

Everyone watching was giving him cheers.<\/p>\n

Everyone watched as the battle started.<\/p>\n

The Black Knight was acting half hearted.<\/p>\n

They circled each other for awhile.<\/p>\n

The serf made a couple of swings with no style.<\/p>\n

The Black Knight just laughed at him.<\/p>\n

He said \u201cIt is time for this charade to end.\u201d<\/p>\n

He took a mighty swing at the \u2018new\u2019 knight.<\/p>\n

The serf jumped back with all his might.<\/p>\n

The Black knight charged forward fast.<\/p>\n

Then he tripped on the serf\u2019s fallen armored ass.<\/p>\n

the serf\u2019s armor pants had slipped to the ground.<\/p>\n

This saving his life as he looked around.<\/p>\n

He jumped up and put his sword on the neck<\/p>\n

of The Black Knight, who froze, his crotch wet.<\/p>\n

\u201cSurrender or die\u201d yelled the serf.<\/p>\n

The Black knight surrendered all to the serf.<\/p>\n

The king was shocked and his daughter was happy.<\/p>\n

The marriage took place and the people were happy.<\/p>\n

So goes the story of \u2018Sir Pantsedalot.\u2019<\/p>\n

The bravest knight who ever fought.<\/p>\n

—————————————————-R. W. Johnson—–(2014)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A Knight\u2019s Tale A long, long time ago. Or, so I\u2019ve been told. In days of old. When knights were bold. There lived a serf named \u2018Pantsedalot.\u2019 I\u2019ll tell you how that name he got. It was because he was pantsed a lot. Sometimes he would pants himself. As he ran around trying to … Continue reading A Knight’s Tale<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,24,26,8,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-441","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fantasy","category-humor","category-kids-corner","category-medieval","category-romance"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/441","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=441"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/441\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":442,"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/441\/revisions\/442"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=441"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=441"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wordsmithwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=441"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}